Keeping a notebook by your bed can be a useful way to remember your dreams long enough to bring them up in session. Jot down some notes when you wake up, even if it’s just a quick image or two that stuck with you.
6. Safely walk through worst-case scenarios.
This one’s for you, fellow anxious human beings. If you tend to catastrophize—meaning, you imagine the worst thing that could possibly happen—sometimes an effective exercise is to follow those thoughts all the way down the rabbit hole and see where they lead. It may seem counterintuitive, but leaning into the anxiety and acknowledging your worst fears can actually lessen them with time. Instead of shutting down an anxious thought, you can engage with it, and ask, “Okay, and then what?”
For most people, it’s important to do this with the help of a professional like a therapist, which is why it’s a solid experience to explore during a session amid the pandemic. “Oftentimes people find themselves alone with these thoughts anyway, and it’s better to experience those spirals with your therapist instead of lying alone in bed at 3 a.m.,” says Fenkel. “The key is having someone who can steer you out of it and help you see possible solutions.”
7. Journal between sessions.
If you’re coming up blank in therapy, it might be that you’re someone who’s used to pulling material from your day-to-day life, says Howes. Maybe you come in ready to talk about a frustrating interaction with a coworker or the latest update on your breakup. Depending on your circumstances, you might find the pandemic is leaving you with a shortage of information to bring into sessions. And while this could be a sign that you need to branch out and look inward instead of relying on external inspiration, it’s not a bad thing to need a prompt.
One activity that’s really helped me as someone who can fall into this pattern sometimes is leaning into my journal practice. Where I used to find it helpful to be able to start a session with an anecdote like, “You’ll never guess what my dad said the other day,” I can now kick off with, “So this is what came up while journaling this week.”
8. Explore the meaning you might derive from the pandemic.
Just like your discomfort with therapy during the pandemic can provide a lot of useful information, your feelings about the pandemic itself can tell you a lot too. It might sound gauche to suggest that there are lessons to be learned from a tragic crisis like the one we’re living through, but the truth is, it’s only natural we make discoveries right now.
“Asking yourself ‘What meaning can we derive from this?’ often leads to an appreciation of life that we can carry out of this,” says Howes. “Maybe that’s, ‘Wow, I really do love seeing people on a regular basis,’ or, ‘I wish I visited my family more,’ or maybe just, ‘I didn’t realize how important routine was to me.’ What is it you’re grieving right now? What are you longing for? That’s a list you can take with you.”
It’s important to remember that meaning doesn’t have to be positive, either. Whatever takeaways the pandemic is offering you, dive into them in therapy.
9. Understand your therapist has a learning curve too.
It might be constructive to keep in mind that you’re not the only one struggling with the new challenges of therapy. From a practice standpoint, therapists have unexpected hurdles too, says Fialk. For example, they can’t fully read body language and other nonverbal cues that typically help them help you. Plus, they also deal with all the awkwardness of bad internet connections, screaming kids in the background, or anything that you’re experiencing.
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