I Bet You Think These Songs Are About You

If you want to think I’m a narcissist for assuming Millie’s Spotify playlists were about me, go ahead. In any case, they probably weren’t about you. Before Millie’s playlists, there was just Millie, the trombonist from Tinder I matched with in my first month of an ill-timed year abroad at Oxford University. It was September […]

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My Plea for a Sixth Love Language

Yet even in these moments of pain or clumsiness, my family would spin it into a wish of togetherness by saying: “May God bring us together again so that I can help you clean up your spills.” Or “I hope that one day we’ll all be together so we can make sure none of us […]

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From Russia With Mixed Feelings

One afternoon I left for the grocery store, forgot my notepad, and doubled back to get it. There I discovered the building manager in our apartment, going through the dresser drawers. Despite her initial startled expression, she snapped at me as she explained it was a routine apartment inspection. As I furiously described the incident […]

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The Loneliness of the Locked-Down Single Mother

“Will you please let me do my job?” she finally said, clearly annoyed. I apologized but also started sobbing. “My husband just died, and I don’t have a Plan B. I don’t know what would happen to my daughter if I got sick.” “I’m sorry,” she said, softening. My husband died without a will. We […]

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Modern Love Podcast: First Love Mixtape, Side B

When we asked this question at the start of the season, the responses came pouring in. We heard from present-day teens streaming their anthems on repeat, and we heard from listeners who have been with their partners for over 50 years. There were stories of jazz and rap, adrenaline rushes and loneliness, and many lessons […]

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Closing Up Shop on a Marriage

The store sells all of life’s mundane items, which in the end get trashed, recycled or flushed. Items that are nothing but also everything: lint rollers, deodorant, greeting cards, magazines, school supplies, vitamins. That time I had a headache, or a sore throat, or that other time when my husband’s allergies flared up after we […]

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Tiny Love Stories: ‘I Quietly, Foolishly Eloped’

She Chose Another Road I have a drawer full of magic. Serums, powders, creams, all promising to reverse time. Every day it takes me a bit longer to look how I think I should. My daughter, now 14, says she has no interest in “patriarchal standards of beauty.” I am at once glad and worried: […]

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The Dentist Who Treated My Divorce

“Yes,” I said. I felt the tears welling up. “That’s it.” My childhood was plagued with jitters and loss related to problems of the mouth: tooth decay, tooth grinding, erratic spacing, several missing molars that an early dentist joked made me either spectacularly evolved or prehistoric. But worst of all were the extra canals in […]

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Modern Love Podcast: Right Swipes, Big City

[theme music] anna martin From The New York Times, I’m Anna Martin, and this is the Modern Love podcast. This week’s essay is about dating apps. If you’re dating today, you kind of have to use them, and using them is exhausting. Bottom line: It’s just really hard to attract the kind of person you […]

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The First (and Last) Time She Didn’t Come Home

The last time my mother and I traveled together was on a college visit to these mountains the summer before she died. We had driven the Blue Ridge Parkway and eaten at a restaurant where marijuana wafted through the air. Barefoot in a stream with bouquets of rhododendron in bloom around us and smooth-worn stones […]

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On (Not) Wasting My Time With a Younger Man

We were almost to the bridge over the I-5 freeway in Eugene, Ore., when he said, “How old are you?” “Forty-five.” I had just asked him his age and was shocked to learn he was only 32. Now it was his turn to be shocked. I was sure we were over. But he just said, […]

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Modern Love Podcast: A Mother’s Wild, Extravagant Love

[theme music] archived recording 1 Love now and always. archived recording 2 Did you fall in love last time? archived recording 3 I love you. archived recording 4 Love was stronger than anything. archived recording 5 Feel the love. archived recording 6 Love. archived recording 7 And I love you more than anything. archived recording […]

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